The Tails of Mardrynia/Transcript
Ms. Baker: a story to the class "The animals danced and feasted a rare night of revelry in the bleak Mardryinian winter. Suddenly, Mrs. Higgles' whiskers began tingling." Kimby: yawns Ms. Baker: 'Something isn't right,' she said. 'I sense it, too,' said Soothlian McTarver. The old gopher sniffed the ground inquisitively." Percy: Oh! Oh! A-Are-- Ms. Baker: "But unbeknownst to our heroes..." Percy: Are any animals real? students groan. Ms. Baker: No, Percy, again, this is just a story. It's not real. Belson: playing with a mechanical pencil Is he old enough to be in this class? Percy: Ohh. Clarence: Percy. Hey, Percy. I think it would be cool if they were real, too. Percy: Me, too! and Clarence both giggle. After school... Percy: on door dog is heard barking in the distance. The door opens up. Clarence: Hey, Percy. Percy: Thanks for having me over. I brought some celery. Clarence: eats the celery and throws it away Hey, want to see a surprise? inside afterwards. Welcome to the legend of animal town! pigeon coos, as an inflatable pool, being used as the 'animal town' is being revealed Look I got us all these animals. giggles. I made us a little animal world, just like you were talking about in class. Percy: Ohh! Aww! Clarence: And now it's real just like you wanted. Percy: giggling How did you find them? Clarence: Well, young Percius... music plays as the scene cuts to a flashback groans as it gets picked up coos and gets caught in Clarence's shirt Clarence: Ah! Y-You're fine. You're fine. scene cuts back to normal. I tried to put a cape on this guy, but he wouldn't really let me. coos Hey, should we give them names? Percy: No, they have to name themselves! Clarence: Oh, okay, uh, uh, that makes sense. Percy: What are we waiting for? Let's have an adventure! enthusiastically jumps onto the edge of the pool, causing it to deflate. Clarence: So, our heroes take off by ship. Uh, but then he remembered flying was better. Percy: giggles Where are you? Clarence: Where'd those little beetle guys go? music plays as the aforementioned beetles crawl out of Clarence's hair and walk down by him. A-Are you getting hungry? Check it out. My mom gave me 20 pizza dollars. She said that I can get my own pizza now, 'cause I'm a big, responsible boy. Percy: Can we bring our friends? Clarence: Aw, yeah! Let's bring them-- Wait, I really want to do that, but... Mary: Okay, Clarence, I'm going to book club. Now, remember, if you're gonna do anything... creative... just keep it in the garage, okay, hon? Clarence: Sorry, buddy. Percy: Ohh. lizard in his hand starts grunting briefly Clarence: We'll have plenty of adventures after pizza. music plays Mrs. Bugsby: E-E-Excuse me. Is it safe? Mr. Bugsby: It doesn't look safe. Xavius: Oh, I'm so famished. Could this be it? The prophecy of the feast, finally? white falls down, which turns out to be pigeon poo. Cookie: Oh, was that me? laughs Wow. Xavius: Anyway, today may be the day we finally fill our bellies. Fartholomew: up and laughs Still clutching to your fairy tales, old man? Xavius: Fartholomew! Fartholomew: Isn't it obvious why we're here, hm? We're here because the pink one locked us up! Diana: Fartholomew, Xavius, please. I must get back to my sons. Help me find a way out of here. Fartholomew and Xavius: Hmph! Back in the kitchen... Clarence: with the telephone Okay, all right. Uh, tell me more about this pizza supreme. Uh-huh. Yeah, I saw that on a commercial. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. music plays Wow. What? laughs You really are cooking up some amazing things over there. stops Percy: We should see if our friends want anything special. Clarence: What? Frie-- wait, wait. Hold on, Jeremy. Hold on. Percy We're not playing that right now. Jeremy Oh, no, no. Not you, Jeremy. I never play games with you. Mm-hmm. Laughs Stop. What? No, you hang up. Okay. Back in the garage... Diana: The only way out is the way the pink one keeps us locked in. Cookie: laughs Coo! Leave it to old Cookie. onto the doorknob and examines its lock Hm. It's locked. Grunts I'm stuck! starts rumbling and a sound similar to a church bell intensifies, and he does a poo once again Uh, wha-what's that? Fartholomew: Oh, no. We're doomed. Back in the living room... ringing He really came. Grunts We called pizza to our house. Giggles We're the moms now. Hello, big, responsible pizza man. I'm a big boy, too. - Yeah, here's your pizza. - Thank you, sir. - Here, Percy. - Warm! - That's Percy. - Yeah. It's gonna be $16. 25. Dang it. I'll be right back. Here we go. - Okay, one, two, more for you - Oh, come on. Oh, sorry. This is such a mess. Let me just straighten these out for you here. Giggles Hm? music plays Ohh Clarence: 6, 7 rhymes with 11, - 12, 13 - Dale: No, come on, kid. You're counting wrong. Just here, let me count. Giggling Back in the garage... Fartholomew: Steady, you nincompoops! Grunting Mr. Bugsby: It's okay, dear. You tried. You rest now. Rest. Diana: Just a little further. Xavius: and gasps as a shadow approaches Oh, my. door opens, and all animals scream as they and the plank crash onto the ground Percy: Hi, friends. I brought you a feast. Back at the front door... Clarence: All right, show me the "bespeckled" president. Dale: Uh, that one. Clarence: That one's Pirate Lincoln. Guess again. Dale: Oh, man. I got to go. Clarence: Oh, um, why don't you just take them all? Dale: Sweet. Clarence: Oh, I'm gonna blow this later. Dale: Just made my night. Clarence: Percy? music plays as the animals celebrate their 'feast' Fartholomew: Luxury! Sheer luxury! Cookie: Laughs Percy: (he's now shown as a mouse named Percius) Laughs Food! Giggling stops Clarence: Percy? resumes Diana: My children shan't go hungry this winter. Cookie: You're my hero, Percius. Fartholomew: May I kiss your tail, Percius? Percius: his tail away No!! Keep dancing! stops opens the door, to see that Percy, in reality, is just crawling around on one single pizza. grunting tones play Clarence: Percy, no! Get out of here. Shoo! Move it, squirrel. Get out of here! Go! Shoo! Percy: Feast! Feast! Feast! Clarence throws the pizza away in a trash can that's outside. The scene cuts to Clarence bathing Percy in the bathroom. Clarence: Percy! Pizza's not for animals. It's people food, for us. Percy: as water is poured over his head Clarence: Uh, it's okay. Percy: and giggles Bubbles. Clarence: All done. Percy: Done! Yay! Giggles Ooh! Clarence, are you gonna kick out all the animals? Clarence: Not tonight. Grunting I'll just let them go in the morning. Percy: But why can't we keep them? Clarence: 'Cause they're animals. They got to be outside and find their own food and stuff. Percy: But I like the animals. Clarence: I know. Good night, buddy. Percy on the cheek and falls asleep once he's in his own bed. Percy: Night-night. Back in the garage... Diana: Face it, Xavius we're through! Xavius: Perhaps the pink one will throw another feast... or something. Fartholomew: Nonsense. There is no love in the pink one's heart. Diana: Fartholomew, you survived the dark times. What would you have us do? The situation now turns into a song, 'End The Boy'. Fartholomew: Ohh, he hates us He keeps us on the ground Maybe it is time - t'was the other way around... Diana: What's he doing? Fartholomew: in the house crashes on the road there's a tyrant sitting smugly on his throne see him laugh, ha-ha-ha - see him sneer Xavius: Oh, yes. Fartholomew: the only thing he covets are your tears All: and, ohh, the pink one Mr. and Mrs. Bugsby: he's a warlock Xavius: He's a jailer Percius: shows up He's not fun. murmur Fartholomew: he tries to break our spirits Percius: he must be defeated All: end the boy Clarence: Snoring All: end the boy, end the boy, end the boy, end the boy end the boy, end the boy end the boy - end the boy, end the boy... Percius: This way! All: end the boy, end the boy - end the boy, end the boy... Percius: Grab your swords! All: and, ohh, the pink one Cookie: He's twisted! Fartholomew: he's evil Percius: He's a bad friend! All: and, ohh, the pink one... situation turns back to reality, where Percy carries the box with animals to Clarence's room. Percy: voice The mighty mighty, mighty, mighty pink one... scene turns back into the song. Fartholomew: he's clever, insane Percius: we'll end him all the same All: end the boy! Percius: Let's go get him! situation returns back to reality, where Percy throws all of the animals onto Clarence, who wakes up by it. Percy: end the boy, end the boy end the boy, end the boy - # end the boy, end the boy # - Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aaaah! Aaaaaah! Aah! Ohh! indistinctly No, no! Oh, no, no! Clarence: Oh, gosh, this is supposed to be the garage. - # end the boy, end the boy, end the boy # - grunts Get out of here! All of you shoo! Shoo! Go! You, too. Groans Xavius: Aah! as he drops onto the ground. Fartholomew: Yes, so much for the prophecy. Xavius: The prophecy lives! There is another. static is seen, crackling Mr. Reese: Snores music plays Clarence: Hey, hey, it's all right buddy. Percy: Whimpers Clarence: I got some secret cereal. the cereal, eats it See? It's good. Mmm. What's the matter? You don't like cereal? Percy: Crying I want to... I want to live in I want to live in someplace magical, but I... but I live in Aberdale! Sobbing I want to live with Xavius and Diana, and I want to fulfill the prophecy of the feast and go to the mouse wedding! Sobbing Clarence: Did you come up with all that yourself? Percy: Yes!! Yes, I made it up! - None of it's real, okay?! Clarence: Okay. Okay. Percy: Sobbing Clarence: Well, do you think you could start over? Percy: Sniffles Back at school... Percy: "And the animals feasted and feasted for 100 winters." The end. Ms. Baker: Okay. Not sure why I let you read that, But, uh, come on guys, let's hear it for Percy's little story he made up. applause Belson: So dumb. Percy: It was real. Clarence: It really happened. Percy They don't know. It was real. Belson: Groans What is he, your baby? Why don't you two just go get-- Grunting as he get a bug stuck in his eye. class laughs at Belson Clarence: All right, Mr. Bugsby! Chuckles Go! Belson: Screams Mr. Bugsby: Sighs A bug could really settle down here. There's so much space. 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